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Alive

Every day supressed
You depressed
It will go on like this
No change no bliss
Living in a hell
Ringing all the bell
Love labour lost
City count cost
One in one out
Disappear no shout
No one will come
When you’re done
Stand up and wipe
Smile again life
Alive is you
Isn’t that true

Written by
Shilpi C. Sinha

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No Replacement for “Maa”

For a couple of months i have focused a lot of attention to some posts i read on Facebook and other social media sites that cite requirement for, a full time care giver or a baby sitter for mother’s and working parents .
They ask for their babies ranging in the age group of as little as 4 months old up to 18 months and older than this can be kept in day care center or creches.

The growing need for extra income , more comfort and putting education to use in order to feel liberated and satisfying our own self, ego and identity has lead to this whole situation  where the ones who actually suffer in all this are the babies.

“Those eyes that keep longing to see their mother, those arms that constantly reach out in vain to grab and hold on to their mothers chest. Those continuous hand and leg movements that continously fight to reach to their mother. The movement of the mouth with lips and tongue that long to kiss and suck onto their mothers breast .
Those cries and yells for mother to come back go in vain”.

As if no body understands them but who are we lying to here we do understand very clearly that baby needs mother and nothing more than his very own mother that bore him inside her for 9 months and he can’t recognize anyone other than her mother where has she gone ?

My heart ached as i again go through the above description, why the little souls have to suffer so much just because they cannot speak or say no or that they can easily forget the pain of l their longing and suffering of the day and forget everything the moment they see their mother.

Why ?

Necessity is one thing that i can understand for anything other than that doesn’t go through my head every explanation is an excuse in front of the child that keeps longing and waiting to see her mother.

For no other person than his/her own mother can provide anything .
Actually there’s no replacement for a thing called maa.
The newborns and some months old babies cannot even speak and god forbid if anything happens to them at the hands of the person you leave them to in care of can one forgive themselves in such conditions.

Am shocked and aghast to see how can people trust for their precious ones. We keep money and gold in utmost safe places, be it best banks or best brand safes and lockers.

And when we need a care giver or an Aaya for baby there’s no brand or best for that. More over we blindly give in with our trust in few minutes of meeting that person because time is running out and we need to get back to work soon.

I personally think when we can already have a decent life in the income of one person that can be any one mother or father then what is the need for the other one to work for.

The point is why should the child suffer or let me put it this way why should you miss the golden years of your baby who is just beginning to bloom and grow and learn and experience new things of life.

No amount of money property or your own liberation can measure up to the amount of pain your baby goes through by just not seeing you around him.

For job and money can have their own time when she or he begins for school or is some years old to be able to put to use some life skills .

Babies and kids who cannot express themselves are very vulnerable beings, don’t  let them to care of a person you haven’t spent some years with. It is important to learn human psychology people are great actors they are different in front of you and completely different in your absence.

You just can’t trust nor leave him with her alone . that’s it !

And even if a child is sble to speak but can’t  express just because he was warned scared and scarred for not letting out that secret .

What can one do?

Simple “IF THERE’S NO NEED THEN DON’T LEAVE YOUR BABY”

Am equally sorry and angry at the condition of today’s world where parents willingly leave their small wonders for everything small in this world.

If you feel bad after reading my post apologies to you but i just can’t see babies crying for their mothers .
It literally tears my heart when i see their teary eyes longing for their mothers. It is worst thing to see a baby crying all day for his mom.

To sit back home and becoming a full time mom is a thing am proud of i don’t need a shit job to liberate myself or create my identity.
I am enlightened enough to appreciate life and the life i have created and lives that surround me by being happy from within.

After all Its Not Necessary !

Natural Health & Healing

Yesterday I asked this question to myself 

Is this all really Necessary ? 

To get a job, to get enrolled for some course, to save money to buy house , to achieve something in life, to make more money, to have a baby as soon as possible , to have big dreams like buying a yacht and a penthouse and doing something in life that is remarkable and something that would make people around me say WOW , and then seeing their expression would make me happy, happy as in real happy i guess.

Its clear, Is this all really necessary , i mean we only do certain things to feel happy and proud only when others are there to see them around who would cheer us, greet us , congratulate us, and work for us or just please us. Isn’t this true !

Imagine there is only you on…

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I Sit

I sit half thinking, half relaxed

here’s the time when am not taxed

leaving work and designation

that bore slavery and recognition

Am no more bound to work anymore

nor do i search for, at any door

I sit casually with my tea

loving and loathing the time that’s free

Unable to think of what to do

To do, to do, to act no clue.

I should practice quietness

for doing snatches happiness

I should just sit happy for a while

Travel inside and work in style

for bread and butter has its own source

I need not get up for any force

In steps i try to travel inside

but thrown away by high tide

still being trapped with work outside

i sit here and sit on the other side

In order to fee…

In order to feel perfect Absence, one should measure the Distance first

I realize the power of missing someone, how does the absence of my hubby creates certain feelings, it never happened before where he had to go for 3 – 4 days office tour, and only now am able to feel and realize the depths of emotions where i long for him so much and never ever realized that he is absent everyday for 8 to 9 hours and comes back home only after office hours. Though he being there in office all day and very much near to me, i can still  have this presence of him, thinking that he is just a few miles away and that’s all that puts to rest my clumsy feelings.

And but now i feel that absence doesn’t matter much what matters is the distance that separates the two of us, the feeling that am i be able to reach him or not, and that there are thousands of miles between us..and oh ! he is so far away, creates more emotions and more feelings inside me. 

Sweet Nothingness

Now I am a complete homemaker, doing all the household chores and actually loving it, we have relocated to this new place and am liking it alot , it seems,  if just two people live under a roof there are so many things to explore and care for rather living with many people and just caring for self.

I like this life and completely in love with the amount of free time and space, its like a dream come true , for what i had always been waiting for , this is what i wanted all the time when i was busy all day doing my job , studies and home tasks. But now its a whole lot of freedom , with no studies no job and no framework for work .

Life is moving really nice and i can feel and sense the time that never flies rather its slow and steady and seems to me that its just what one requires in life that he she doesn’t need to run with time rather wait for the time to chime.

Time that flows slow is simply sweet and wonderful because it has nothing to do with materialism, moreover it has the qualities of disintegrating you into different forms where one can explore and discover a lot about life in its true forms , the real essence of it and true meaning that revolves around things that we forget to peep into.

Simple encouraging acts of small work or no work and just enjoying the environment in the present mood itself is quite enchanting experience because you are so much free , you have all the time to do something and to do nothing , this explorations of nothingness is beyond comparison where you can be just with you, there’s no running for being someone else like in your office shoes or  have makeup or to read some news.

Its just you and the time you have all the time even that you forget about time.

I can only mean…

I can only mean love to you when am free, for i cannot attend to your beauty or handsomeness as i carry loads of work that obstructs my vision.

Love can happen only when a person is free from worries and work. And since a person is potentially busy and is loaded with pressure then he she can never enjoy love or its beauty or for that matter even the nature. 

Rebellious Hope Beyond Personalized Failure

Every genre of life holds some kind of productive roots that need to be harnessed in order to sustain for life and better livelihood to keep cycle of life consistent. For a human, its quite unimaginable to think about a life that is absent of materialism.The pursuit of this powerful yet significant source ( money) for life is ruthless and impinges upon the life so much that without it one can barely live the act of living.

The insatiable human life that never cease’s to desire materialism, hardly has any space left for spiritual conscious growth that could pose as a great escape for some who breath their last breath of soot in misfortune as their endless failures never ended.

For some failure is the end of experiments but for me failure is a beautiful concept that reminds me of my existence, am alive and in action and that I am making full use of every breath of mine. And i never fail to happen be it for countless failures or little spells of chance success. life is as much you and i know about it with past present and future attributed around two words success or failures but we fail to see beyond these two dictionary words.

It is unexpected of any human to detach them self from the life they have today, with so much of happening around them, since childhood school to their adulthood offices, life is full of events, emotions etc. whatever has happened in the past or whatever will happen in the future, we all try to personalize them and include those events of the past to the present moment and even attach the present shaping to suit it best for the future.

In the process we stop realizing the present which is all today the very moment we live in, we care so much about the failures the mistakes the events that happened that it begin to shape our future through our present moments of pondering over the past, thinking it shouldn’t happen again in the future we keep ruining and playing with the present.

The future has innumerable opportunities that the present may not know, the lack of awareness of the future is a blessing i believe as the graph of life is never a line, its rhythmic and this is a sign that we should have rebellious hope to do our work till the end whatever be the outcome let it remain, let it hold, but never stop the action.

Failures often leave us down and disappointed and even hopeless so much that we choose to quit action or some may even quit their lives, because again the matter is how you take the failures . There can be intermittent or consistent failures in life , if you ask me, i have consistent failures that i never personalize.

Because the day you begin to personalize with the failures its the day you cease to act anymore. Be it one or endless failures it should never let you stop, rather be rebellious having hope not for success or winning but hope that you shall continue despite these failures even if it happen time and again .

To hope in misery is to be rebel, to hope life in death is rebel, Hope is an endless rebellion towards life that even failure is natural and so is the hope that should never end. Hope is just not a factor or a word if you term it like that then the failure is just a word defined for a thing, idea, or event that went wrong not the way you planned.

I believe that these terms like, failure, mistakes, devastated  depressed, death, divorce, pain, ruined etc are becoming more symbolic and full of imagery the moment you think of them whereas the positive words like being happy, love,hope, faith, never give up, belief  etc are becoming more abstract because we can barely find any of the events describing them in our imagination when we are only going through the above negative terms that heavily sits and eat up our conscious.

which is why more and more people are becoming sad and full of disappointing because the ones they seek approval from or even look up for positivism are themselves full of negativity in and around them. we actually have lost our innate capacity to harness our own energy for being positive and its hard to do that mechanical work now of rebuilding.

The more practical answer to failures is then only the rebellious hope for this you need not change your mental setup of all positive and spirituality because i know its very hard to do it, even i cannot pull myslef from thinking negative so many times but the thing i always practice is this incessant hope i keep which becomes more and more rebellious with every failure that i encounter.

It has made me hard and courageous and so much that am least affected by life, am more able to enjoy small moments of happiness i dont long for big ones and i enjoy small things like eating the left piece of cake, or cooking some noodle, playing with my niece, or watching my Favorite songs. I no longer wait but i still move and act and i dont give up on action in life for there’s nothing to loose till the time you’re alive play with life.