We’re alone in our own struggles, we cannot reach nor anyone can reach us, its just us who has to go .
Abhi dum nikla nahi
Thoda aur chalne do
Hawao ka rukh badla nahi
Tufaan ko aane do
Maine haar maani nahi
kashti mein hun sawar
Abhi saas baaki hain
Doob jaane do patwar
Door kinara ho sahi
Main chalang laga du
Tairna sikha nhi magar
Samandar ko dubaa dun
Kinare pahuchna mumkin
hai Magar itna zaruri nahi
Zindagi samundar mein hai
Kinhi kinaro mein nhi…
Shilpi Chauhan Sinha
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ManyMee: Lighting-up the other side of Moon
“If we are not able to freely share what we want to, connectivity is futile”
It is a connected world. We are all connected to each other with the help of technology. The question is why is there a need for connectivity? We want to communicate. While communicating we share. There are a lot of things we share and a lot of things we don’t. We share only the good stuff. We share the stuff that makes us superior to others or maintains status quo . “Others” are none but the people in our own little circles. I being in India will not be showing my superiority to someone is Sao Paulo. Closer the relationship, stronger is the urge to display superiority. If what we share does not raise our position, even for a few hours, we do not share. When there is nothing to share, we fabricate and share stuff that will make us superior thus what we share is hardly a true representation of our lives. Even if we share, it is a very small fraction of our lives.
Life is not about “Likes”. Not all situations in life are “likable” Life is not the same always. Times are sometimes easy and sometimes difficult. There may be situations in life that does not raise our status. These are the times when we want to – share and get our spirits lifted, receive honest and unbiased help and support, search for inspiration, have others help us get going, know that we are not alone but there are others who are in the same boat as ours. These situations may not be likable.
But in these times we do not share as the existing platforms don’t allow us to do so as they are predominated by “Like”.
In the existing social platforms, connections are mostly based on pre-existing relationships. The people who are connected to you have preconceived notion about who you are. There is a pre-existing image of everyone. You are already somebody there. Everyone has been labelled and tagged. Our little circle feeds the so called images and keeps them alive. Status quo is maintained. Everyone remains who they are. The existing circles help maintain “status quo”. They do not help you grow. But since life is not the same always, maintaining status quo does not work and the whole setup fails.
There is a subtle tacit non-acceptance in our circles when we share about something that has changed within us as a result of occurrence of certain events in our lives or we ourselves are trying to bring about some change in ourselves. We are subconsciously aware of this non-acceptance and this gives rise to tremendous inhibitions in trying to share and show in our little circles that you are not the same person again. The presence of the very circle inhibits us from sharing.
Thus sharing is restricted and is incomplete. Sharing is being influenced by the presence of people in our little social circles. Thus we are not able to pour our heart out. The existing connectivity with our friends and acquaintances is restricting us from sharing freely. Thus connectivity is not being able to deliver its complete value.
In order for connectivity to deliver complete value, we have created ManyMee. At ManyMee we may also share stuff that are not likable or stuff we hesitate to share. ManyMee does not work against the existing platforms but complements them by making “connectivity” deliver full value. At ManyMee we are connected to everyone but to none in particular. We have also done away with the “like” icon and have introduced three new icons. At ManyMee you are free to pour your heart out as the restrictions that have been brought about by the presence of people in our little circles are not there. ManyMee does not intend to connect you people who have preconceived notions about you nor will their status, real or fake, have a controlling influence on your confidence, thus enabling you to freely open up and share being who you truly are. Once you are able to share at will, connectivity is worthwhile and we are ourselves again.
— Written by Arnab Sinha ( hubby )
Every day supressed
It will go on like this
No change no bliss
Living in a hell
Ringing all the bell
Love labour lost
City count cost
One in one out
Disappear no shout
No one will come
When you’re done
Stand up and wipe
Smile again life
Alive is you
Isn’t that true
Shilpi C. Sinha
Somethings there,that isn’t bright,
somethings there without light
wondering where to find some
if its one or maybe none
i look into free spaces everywhere
upon the surface and inside layer
there’s something that i miss now
unknowing where to find and how
busy feelings and slave thoughts
of past or dead doesn’t rot
unable to figure what happens
life and lifelike dampens
struggling to explore that something
for some life is better than dumping
Life is great for some people who are born with disarming looks along a life of riches which makes things easier for them to achieve. And for those born into average looks and lead an average life things dont come easy to them , if it does its attributed to either destiny or luck, but if they dont appear even after hard work and struggles it all comes down to even below average where another sorts of problems collect around them.
I suppose that there are a plenty of people on this planet who lead a very plain life and often at some point of time would have desired if things could be reversed like the way they were born, or if they had paid attention to their looks earlier or if their parents were keen enough to care for them even more like the parents of the other kids do for them. we all must have felt this way certainly because we are born unhappy since the day we are born we begin life by crying and end it up crying for things we could never have or be born with.
The major portions of life for women alt east runs around their looks , how attractive they are or how others think about them, the way they should dress but cannot, the makeup they can put on but cannot afford to have, and even to wear and be like those divas on the ramp but they cannot because they have got other better things to do that are safe and acceptable rather than walking the ramp.
These thoughts that beauty gets all are not mine they are coming from generations that a person gets everything in life if they are attractive and have an eye catching personality .And since generations these thoughts have hardened so much that they cannot be broken down maybe stereotypical of me to think but i cannot refrain ignoring it when i have vicarious experiences to share that yes beauty outnumbers brain.
Talking of my school days, i recollect how the most beautiful girls of my class quoted ” After school i will marry the man of my dreams and live life like a queen ” at that time too i never had this mindset, i was steady that yes i have to study do my college and do a job and i shall be married off to a humble man and have to do the chores and work along to make ends meet, and no other thoughts seduced me or contradicted to those i had ever since school.
But now as iv seen so much in life i wonder that is it necessary to carry out similar thoughts its no where written that god and society favors the beauty history is full of characters and heroes who aren’t beautiful yet remembered for their works and not for their looks. And In times today with all bot ox and jabs beauty is just a few lacks away deal to get. But am not inclined to do so nor i think many of the people who an afford or who cannot are bold enough to live life as they are born not what they should have with.
Which is why we have so much of beauty promoting ads, lighter skin tone, tanned skin, fairer skin, wrinkled, age less, spotless, needless to say that its eating out the natural way we used to live and for the ones who wish to live the natural way it makes life hard for them, a simple challenge here, can one go without even using a moisturizer to work or lip gloss or kohl, no i guess not, and what about not getting your eyebrows or upper lips done, i guess you cannot live like this or i should say look like this. But if i had the chance,i would never take so much of pain to groom myself for the way society wants me to be , when i can live with those.
But again we are all part of the society and not following its norms as a girl would mean so much of chaos for myself and those concerned with me. Kind of names they would give you, or even term you as psychologically imbalanced person, wow so much for simplicity , but then who dares because i want to live in this society only i dont want to deviate or break free, the only thing i want and desire and many like me that they can at least have freedom, when dealing with their outer appearance and their own body for that matter.
It will take a long time for people to accept a de glam life because a life full of glam and shimmer is what attracts to a lot and we often envy those people in hold of it, well its quite natural to have those feelings if you are born human and not a fish, and we slowly separate ourselves with such people be it in sh cool , college or work as if those people are beyond our reach , but then only if you talk to them , you may find some turn out to be just like their looks and some completely opposite are shallow.
But then we cannot judge everyone based on their looks and its even not fair to say that all average looking people are kind enough , everyone has an innate individuality and personality that reflects be it behind the makeup or after a face wash. Its needed that we get in touch with the real glam heart of people and its also needed that the society weighs conscious over glee and glam.
A de glamorous life is not that easy to live, but its full of good things to look into and get inspired with.
A few years back i always thought about getting married and how beautiful the life will be like every girl would have thought , to go places, to see the world , to hold hands, to eat good food , to wear the most fashionable clothes on honeymoon, to love and hug and get love and hugs 24 /7 and forever and ever. I too had such beautiful and exciting thoughts about getting married.
And i did get married and all wasn’t beautiful as it looked like in my case, because i had this picture in my mind that did not fitted well when i saw the other couples and heard their stories of romance and love making and how beautiful it was all in the arranged setup . I still managed for a good time but had to separate soon as things went ugly to awry and so it had to happen because after giving your extreme self to the other, there come’s a time when you have to realize that the heart that beats inside your body is the sound of your soul that wishes to live .
One has to believe that this life is not your or mine or anyone else’s for whom you need to sacrifice not even for your own miseries you dont have to die unless your time comes till that moment you should live with all its struggles, sufferings , good , bad, pain, sorrow, happiness, love etc. I too had my moments where i thought everything is shattered, am in ruins and other stuff about thoughts to die and live no longer, and the best part i was encouraged even more to succumb to my thoughts passively by some people. But i never took the extreme i always prolonged that period of pain further than to fall apart.
I’ve learned and matured in my thoughts and to this day my problems and life struggles haven’t ended, and i have experimented with these feelings that how the other person lives well and am still in troubles, i have thought a way out for this too, i think i haven’t seen this person’s complete life what is there in his/her life , how bad or good his time will be or how he she would suffer or die i do not know, so would i still be willing to compare or desire his/her life or even exchange it . No ,not for once i hold my karma and my consequences as my own and i would never wish to change it with anyone else’s .
Believe you me even today after all that i still struggle and there’s so much in my life that needs to be well placed. After separation i lived quite peacefully and met a good person on a legal portal, he too is separated and still struggling a lot without a job and money, and its been like this since the last 2 years and more, we have been with each other in rough times and holding each other, where we have least hopes for our marriage or a comfortable life in future, we shall have to do a lot to make ends meet. But we are not afraid to do that even because we will be together is what we care for.
Had it been like this, that only we two were concerned forever it could be easier but then, the sad part is the mix of two families our well settled wealthy relatives and friends who lead life of luxuries always keep asking about when, where, how, why and what of our life’s, thank god i have got so much strength and courage to put a really great shape and face in front of them and even for him, we dont open up easily. I keep assuring everyone about our future and we shall live good and he will get a job soon he is trying hard.
We have never given up on hope , to live a positive life with good thoughts , we struggle and cherish this period of struggle because we know we have met each other that was the best thing that could happen to us, we cry one hour but feel OK the other hour. i dont know where this enormous strength has come to us that we have suffered so much, that we are toughened by these circumstances and we just hope and wait for our days to change and let the sun shine for us .
Whenever am in trouble and have depression like feelings i always think that at least am alive to correct it and life is much greater than the problems itself, so why t worry as this period will go away , maybe it becomes a long period end-up in years but still it will end someday, it cannot remain forever. And believe its encouraging to think that you live good to change things , think of other things where you are killed by some mad person or die in a freak accident , its best that god has given you this chance and you are alive and able to transform the bad to good.
No wonder life is full of phases of good and bad but its best to endure in that time it can last for years and years but you still need to put up a smiling face before the society and friends so that they cannot know what you face, as only a percent of people will understand you and you never know which percent is that. So its best to keep your life and struggles to yourself it gives you courage strength and wisdom to continue and grow in life.