Tag Archives: stress

Happiness

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Our Mind (psyche )is very naughty, it plays with us, it wanders , it goes from here to there, from home to office, from office to places Imageand keeps wandering , jumping here, there and everywhere. It is never still, it was never meant to be still,it was always like that, going around and coming around like a swing , it has its high’s and low’s .

It is never stable it is always in motion and so we are left in motion, moving with the flow of the mind, that carries our body with it, wherever it takes we go along, unknowing what it has to offer but we still go because after all its our mind that tells us and that controls us. we cannot do anything nor we can question what it wants or why it wants something, a thing even it sees that passes by like a new phone , a new car, or a new dress, it screams in our mind that YOU MUST HAVE IT , Why Not Own it !

We think we want it, so we begin to desire it, and finally it is our mind that tells us, we require it, but actually we don’t, we never realize its irrelevance until we have it, after a long struggle of pain tension, longing and forgoing almost every small and big happiness, for this particular thing,because we were waiting to be happy only the day we have it, that we always thought could make us really happy.

And so we begin to neglect everything in pursuit of this material that we never wanted since the beginning, but our mind said something, about its need, so we went after it, and all these days, months and years we wasted in getting that thing. And now we are used to the art of getting after things, living only for the big moments, small things no longer or never actually made us happy, even attempts by people around us to make happy shall go in vain, which is why people no longer matter to us. 

None of the relations make us happy, because we see in them our own reflection , as if they are also after something , something much greater than my own thing, as soon as we think this they become our competitors and thus they no longer remain close to us, they are our enemies , they are now part of the great competition. 

Slowly and Slowly life becomes more void, because now the mind craves even more, once you hold the thing you always wanted since years you move onto next , the value of this thing becomes Zero from the time you seize it . just think about this, for a moment, it doesn’t even matter now, how long can you enjoy it after all.

Again your mind sees a thing and starts wandering no longer the thing you got makes you happy , you remain more sad and more anxious and more worrying about your next goals, your next agenda’s or next thing you want to own, that you think would be ultimate source of happiness. 

It hardly happens because since the beginning you were not happy and the moment you saw that thing made you more unhappy and the pursuit , the journey made you even more unhappy inside, and now you are conditioned to remain unhappy for long, now nothing can be done to make you happy , even this thing you just bought after so many years of hard work fails to make you happy. 

You were always anxious, wandering and roaming around here and there , your mind was never still. had it been so it would just have been like the observer who sees the most awesome st of things in life but is hardly affected by them, nothing changes inside him, not even a nerve or a blink of eye . He remains the same goes on doing what he is doing, and is least moved by what he sees around. 

And the one who sees around but never gets involved with it, in his mind is the most happiest soul ever.

Written By 

SHILPI CHAUHAN SINHA

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Does it matter where Positivism come’s from ?

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We talk about being positive, having positive attitude and positive approach towards life.

Today Positivism has filled every corner of our life its there at the work or in our home, where the need and demand is growing at a very fast pace just as the technology is making our live’s vulnerable and stressful. The global life of an average person is being run over by stress , confusion, crises, tension, unfulfilled needs, desires complexities, problems, pain, suffering, and delusions that has become more or less an identity if that very person.

  For Instance , If we have a person who is every day ranting about his promotion at the work place, this person’s identity becomes  different unlike his skill or name he might be called as Mr. promotion or a real example about a women ( here  one of my friend ) who loves to splurge and go after brand shopping, it were no problem if she kept all that to herself rather pulling us who cannot spend so much and looks down upon us, for this i actually gave her a name i.e Ms Price Tag. 

There is nothing to ridicule about such people by assigning them names and they happen to be everywhere among our friends,  family, relatives, acquaintances etc who they are or how they relate to us is not the problem but the problem is that their goodness hides behind these over expressive attitudes and becomes extinct in wake of such behavior which is so frequent and predictable that none can expect anything else other than what they actually do everyday.

And Since this becomes the routine, it gets much harder to change or break such attitudes that stem from problems itself, because every kind of problematic attitude has origin that was first limited to that person and gradually spreads around as attitudinal problem that was formed to overcome the problem but happens to become more complicated. Such people are then stereotyped and named and the same notions are passed on to others even the new members who come in to their contact.

Everything that was positive or could be positive or explored positive fades out and even deteriorates with time. It is very important to prick the attitudinal balloon right away at the right time before it inflates and spreads and start acquiring space. The task is pretty hard and gigantic but still some can lead to make efforts in the right direction with right attitude. It really pains me a lot when the person is prejudged for his/her behavior on the basis of observation or the information provided by others around them.

So it becomes relevant in view of the above consequences to bring change among the people in question who may not readily agree to accept the harshness they carry in their attitude or that something they do affects the mental setup of the other people around them.  And thus it becomes next to impossible that anyone can bring change to them, for if we begin to try they might never agree to it and will investigate about the source of positivity that is coming from me or you for that matter.

But we cannot cease to look for change and bring out the goodness in them even if they abhor us for doing so. Because even we are not complete perfectionist or having really really good behavior, we have our fair share of mistakes and problems that we carry along and so it becomes difficult.

Its only if we can create a balance and complete positive outlook about ourselves first even if we are ignored, deprived, or  hated for some period but then if we keep gauging and encouraging the other person’s goodness to bring it out more in conversations and actions in front of the other people as well and get it all reinforced from others too, we can very well change the problematic attitude.

 

True Love’s Journey

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न चाहत जगाओ अब सोने दो मुझे   

इस चाहत में बिगड़े थे सपनो के किले  

ना फैसला किया न सोचा यह दिल                                                                                                                                 

बस बनाता गया मुझे उनके काबिल                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

 

 

जो टूटे इस कदर रिश्तों भरे वादे 

सपनो  में सजोये थे जो उनसे मिलके,
 
की हुए बेपरवाह वो  क्यूँ  इस तरह

ना मैं  समझी ना मेरी वफ़ा 
 
 
क्या इस दिन के लिए ही चाहा था मुझे
 
जो इश्वर की कसम भी न रोक पाई तुम्हे

यू बीच मझदार छोड़ मुझे जब चल दिए,
 
 हर लम्हा हर वक़्त तन्हाई के मैंने जिए 
 
 
जब भूल चुकी थी चाहत की परिभाषा,

तब आकर किसीने मेरा हाथ थामा

हैरान थी मैं यह सोच-सोच कर,

क्या मुस्कुरा पाऊँगी कभी इन आंसूओ को पोछकर 
 
 
पर यूँ  किसिंने आकर बदल दिए चाहतों के मायेंने,
 
जो न सपनो में थे ना कभी अनजाने 

कैसे सबकुछ मेरा तुमने बाँट लिया,

हर दुःख भरा लम्हा मेरा तुमने छाँट लिया 
 
 
तुमने चाह्त को मेरी दिया एक नया मोड़,

मेरे दुःख के हर लम्हे को दिया तुमने तोड़ 

सब दे दिया इस चाह्त से भी आगे बड़के, 

अपनी दुनिया में बसाने, इस समाज से लड़के
 
 
 
इस कश्ती में सवार न जो होते तुम, 

जाने किन तुफानो में हो जाती मैं गुम

इस भीड़ में आकर नज़रो से तुमने संभाला,

नज़रो से ही पहनाई मैंने मिलन की वरमाला 

 

 

जो तुम न होते, तो क्या मैं होती

और जो ना होते, तो क्या सपने संजोती,

बस इस चाह्त भरे ख्वाब को खुली आँखों से देखती,

सच हो सब सपने, मेरे दिल की  हर आवाज़ कहती 

 

 

कोई बंधन अब इतना नहीं मूल्यवान,

ना साथ रहने में ही लिखे सब समाधान

हर जनम का साथी वो सिर्फ मेरा है,

साथ उसके ही जीवन का हर सवेरा है

 

 

अब तो डर भी नहीं, ना बंदिश कोई, 

चाहतो के प्यार भरे साये में, मैं खोयी

जो तुम हो तो सब कुछ है पास,

जो तुम न हो ,तो न हो कोई आस

 

 

हर जीवन के पल में रहे साथ तुम्हारा,

इस नदी की लहरों को मिले किनारा 

येही बात और येही जज़्बात,

जोड़े हमे हमेशा एकसाथ

 

 

 मेरे प्यारे सनम मेरे भोले सनम 

तुमको देती मैं आज प्यार की कसम 

कि साथ निभाने का दे दो मुझे वचन 

इस जनम से अब हर जनम

Resist that Urge to Gratify : Practice Self Control

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Power of Self Control where nothing Distracts, Influences or calls Attention of the Enlightened Gautam Buddha.

Just look at this wonderful Picture of the Great Gautam Buddha sitting under the Bodhi tree deeply meditating, where nothing almost nothing in the world has the power enough to distract him, be it the beauty or the beast. There’s nothing that can disturb his peace with his innermost self , break his meditation and destroy his Conscious state of  Enlightenment.

No doubt its almost unbelievable to achieve that state of Consciousness as its very tough and even harder in times today where there is complete struggle to earn your bread and butter after which there is a mad rush to fulfill those endless pursuits of success, praise, fame and most importantly good money. In a nutshell its the materialistic world that attracts us, as its said “Evil is attractive” that shifts us away from going after more simpler and spiritual life experiences.

Its unbelievable to attain such enlightenment and peace, but its not Impossible too , it would be a great achievement if we are able to attain even a fragment of this inner consciousness through Meditation that leads to Self control and an Enlightened soul within us.

The road to Self Control is through Regular practice of Meditation, that one can do every day for around 15 to 20 minutes, where you sit in a quiet place anywhere in your room, porch, garden, park or any place you feel you can be with your self alone for a brief time period. I can also understand that you may be running in the morning for office, work or house chores but you must find time for your own self , to heal your mind, body and spirit in a true sense .

And if you are able to make enough space for yourself in a day then the next ordeal is to filter your thoughts, where daily errands may be jumping, running, disturbing and buzzing in your mind where you think after this, i have to check mail, cook meal, dress the kids, go to the gym, complete office work and much much more, it doesn’t stop even if you close your eyes from the outside world and think now it is disconnected , its actually not, the thoughts are still there in you and this is where you have to work upon to get rid of those thoughts.

Just believe that this time is for you, your peace your connection with your self , you have this appointment specially with you and nothing or no one is as important today other than you.

When you Close these Eyes, it means you close yourself from this world outside and do not let thoughts related to world outside bother you, am not saying be thoughtless as the mind can never be without thoughts rather concentrate on your breathing , where you inhale and exhale, and observe your thoughts if any and one by one let go of them as they eat up your energy and willingness to concentrate . but in case if they still persist then chant a mantra like “Om Namah Shivaya” as the mantra saves you from other thoughts that deplete your energy.

OM NAMAH SHIVAYA

As you practice you may gradually see that the distracting thoughts will subside and only the breathing that you do or the mantra that you chant exists and all other things cease to happen, then is the state where you experience a complete feeling of bliss and contentment. Stay in that state for a while and experience the peace and relaxation of that mental state.

Though this is the first time for many, but it surely is powerful enough to bring you back again as you cherish peace and inner happiness of all day long. And it can be hard to sit first time,but dont force yourself , as you are doing this for yourself and not for others, so it doesn’t have to be a stressful activity. With daily practice and time you may give you will gain more power and will be able to sit for longer periods of time and even reflect more deeply in levels that you attain with time.

Meditation benefits you a  lot :

Meditation helps in overall relaxation of mind where your thoughts are pure , wise and free from negativity.  It also improves your will power where you refine your inner strengths and beliefs that helps you surround with positivism and goodness .

Meditation brings Self Control in a person’s life which enhances the skills to supervise and regulate the behavior where you may get a sense of power to curb immediate urge for gratification of needs, which may harm your well being or of the others around you, it helps in exercising restraint as an when needed in a well balanced way that does not affect you even when those needs are not fulfilled.

Self Control is a very important facet of life skills, one should practice, in order to maintain a healthy and peaceful life. we often get influenced by beauty, tastes, luxuries, riches, fame, money etc. and even provoked by situation or people who may insult, anger, discourage, or disturb us in some way or the other. In such events we may not be able to exercise Control over our emotions and express them which may be taken by others in a negative way.

And this is why its best to exercise self control that will only come through Meditation, it has a wide variety of positive effects in your life where you will improve your relationships, make better decisions, increase your concentration and attention span, think rationally and logically.

It will even help you to choose to be at peace, instead of being part of negative gossips, office politics, back bitching etc. It helps you to rise above all odds where you would not be disturbed by negative people or situations around you and always be Conscious of your self that will take you one level higher than others which is the ultimate goal of your existence and leads to enlightenment of the inner self.