Feeling Away

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my sweet niece tiddu whom I miss so much

my sweet niece tiddu whom I miss so much

Everything is superb , nice, awesome and fantastic just the way I thought about life that’s going to be after my marriage and it truly is very nice and comfortable.

But still something’s amiss something makes me sad and cry some, being surrounded by all happiness and goodness I still feel away from them its just about 15 days since I got married but I miss my family my mom, dad , niece, sister in law and my brother, everyone so much, and its more about missing my home and Delhi , the place where I’ve lived since birth.

And here in Kolkata almost thousands miles away from home I feel lost many a times since my transition is yet to begin this is just a fragment of it am with my new mom and dad in their home but next or coming weeks I will shift to another place in Kolkata itself again some 25 miles away from them .

So much to happen , I feel that if my inner state is little troubled this time and there are so many people around me to support and love me , how will I manage without them all alone when my my hubby would be off to work and ill  be alone at home. That is the time I need to think about what will I do and how will I manage my time and emotions .

It will be new for him as well but I have more problems than him, language constraints not knowing Bengali, an old locality unlike the city in Kolkata, away from family and even the lovely maa in law,  and much more that takes rounds in my head. Am unable to think clearly as to how will I live and manage time with emotions.

Sometimes I fear my own feelings as am strong and do not wish to succumb to them, actually I have waited for these moments all my life after going through so many troubles in the past , but then here am and this life and situation is about me and I have to tackle it.

Will get back with more updates as I need all your advice and inputs for my new journey to help me adjust and live in a good mental shape.

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13 responses »

  1. Best wishes to you Shilpi! Iam really happy to know you are welcomed with love there and find the new home a wonderful place. Iam sure you will be able to cope up with the changes coming soon,as changes are inevitable. And you will enjoy the excitement,challenges and happiness of staying together and being away. For your engagement, you can pursue your passion when you have free time.

    • dee you re absolutely right, change is inevitable . and yes am looking forward to all the free time id have once am relocated with my hubby.
      Its really difficult and its going to be that ways I know but I just wish to remain in control and not give up as everything is just good except the feeling of being away.
      thank you for sharing and enlightening me dee. keep in touch and guide me always.
      tk cre

    • thank you so much. And id love to keep sharing my moments here, its the only place at present where I still connect with the ones I were with before, after and would be forever .

  2. All I can say is pray to your Gods that they may give you courage and wisdom to openly embrace the new life as a married woman. And I will pray to my God to send peace your way.

    • thank you so much dear, I really need immense courage to embrace this overall change in my life. Deep down my heart aches and pains as I feel so much away from my mother and home. But I know I have to accept my present . I will pray as only prayers can heal me.
      thank you so much love.
      tk cre

  3. Hi Shilpi! nice to hear from you….dear these feelings are very natural. Once you get married and leave your parents and all family members behind that makes you feel sad and unhappy. But dear believe me you will adjust to this new life in coming days. Soumya rightly said that changes are inevitable part of life…and you will cope up with all new challenges of life with time…..try to enjoy moments of togetherness…..try talking to your family members on regular basis. It makes u happy and you will not feeling away….Give yourself a little time……God Bless You dear…..tk cr.

    • hello rachna dee
      I hope ur doing great and hows my sweet angel ?
      Dee am trying my best to adjust and cope with the new changes , what effects me most is the place and distance , that makes me feel far away from my parents. though everything and everyone at my new home is good, no problem at all. just the new place and locality everything is affecting my emotional setup. But am trying hard as its not gonna work like this if I keep crying and yearning for them, I ll lose upon my present. and I cant talk to my mum as my heart aches and i fear calling her coz i might cry and she will feel bad and may not even sleep. so i refrain myself from calling her ,i talk only when am in a jovial mood and she can least sense my feelings .her voice makes me break down and i don’t want to sound sad or gloomy over the phone. i know this phase will pass away with time and i need to look into other activities that will keep me busy during my free time.
      thank you so much dee ur words lift me up.
      love u and plz be thr like uve always been for me ..
      tk cre and hugs to my angel.

  4. oh dear she is so cute
    any body would miss her

    dear your are absolutely normal
    and you will overcome this I know

    this a a blessing & promise from an elder brother

    be happy dear be very happy
    my best wishes for you

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